“Where are you from?” and a sense of belonging
When one is abroad and gets to make new friends, the question, “Where are you from?”, is one that will inevitably pop up. As the number of immigrants here rises, more Singaporeans are asking new acquaintances this same question.
For Chinese nationals, the answer can be just China, or narrowed down to the specific province or city. If the person who asks the question does not understand Mandarin, one’s citizenship is often an adequate reply. But if he or she is an overseas Chinese or has some knowledge about China, the answer may include province, city and even district.
Having experienced both situations often enough, I am beginning to feel that much more is involved in this seemingly simple conversation.
For someone with a straightforward life experience – born, raised and lived in the same place – the answer is equally straightforward. But it is trickier for a person whose ancestral home, birthplace, the place he grew up, got married and worked in are not the same – in different cities, provinces and even countries. There is a lot more that he can choose to say in response to the simple “Where are you from?” query. Why and what he decides to say may reveal a lot about him.
One may mention the ancestral home, perhaps out of a deep sense of affection for the forefathers, or maybe it is a place that is world-famous for boasting many renowned personalities. Yet another person may refer to the city where he was born, grew up, got married and set up his essential network of relations. He may have a fond memory of the place or, in short, it is a place where he feels he belongs to.
Whatever one says and the reasons for it, it is easy to detect the affection for, and a sense of identification with, the place mentioned. The feeling is neither ethnic nor national identification, but a sense of belonging.
Let me explain how this happens. First, one must enjoy a certain mobility, having been to different cities in a country or different parts of the world and, in the process, develops varying degrees of liking for the place he has spent time in, which is the basis for growing a sense of belonging.
Second, while such an emotional affiliation may overlap with national identification, they are different. It is possible for someone living in a foreign land to feel attached to that place but remains a citizen of the country where he came from.
Last year, when I was in Australia on an official assignment, the public relations consultant who received me is a New Zealander who has been working in Australia for some years. She told me: “I love Australia even though I’m a foreigner here. But dealing with another foreigner like you makes me feel that I’m an Australian. I love this feeling.”
Taiwanese Hsiao Bi-k him who holds an American passport but also serves as an adviser to the Taiwanese President, is another example of someone whose sense of belonging and national affiliation are not identical.
Last but not least, one has full control and freedom over the matter. While one cannot choose one’s birthplace, one can certainly decide, based on what one has experienced, the best place to settle in.
A place which can make one grow fond of, and identify with, must have its charm and attraction. A scenic environment, a warm and caring people, a gracious society, good living conditions and more opportunities for success are just some possible reasons.
The intense global competition for foreign talent has made some countries and cities take this “sense of belonging” approach to attract them.
The dynamic Shanghai city is an excellent example. It used to be the city that was “most discriminatory against foreigners” – in the eyes of Shanghainese, all non-Shanghainese were “country bumpkins”. Yet it has now opened its door to foreign talent and is promoting the idea of a “new Shanghainese”. One is a Shanghainese so long as one works or runs a business there, never mind where one comes from. Global capital and talent have flocked there and it now has plenty of dwellers who do not speak Shanghainese.
This discussion on sense of belonging and identification has a special meaning for an immigrant society like Singapore. If we can make passing travellers and foreign talent identify with us and sink roots here, there will be added dynamism and vitality for our progress.
“你是哪里人？”与归属认同
“你是哪里人？”出门在外、认识新的朋友时，总能听到这句问话。随着外来移民越来越多，经常也听见新加坡人问新认识的人“你是哪里人？”
就中国来的朋友而言，答案的范围从国家到省份、到城市，可大可小，视不同环境而定。问的人若是不谙华语，通常说国籍即可。若是海外华人或对中国有些认识的，就可以具体到省、城市甚至区，就看对方对中国的了解有多深了。答的多，自己问别人的也多，渐渐觉得人们在这一问一答间，还颇有讲究。
有的人经历简单似一条直线，自祖辈就生于彼、长于彼，答案只有一个选项。有的则有些特别，祖籍、出生地、成长地、成家地、工作地各有不同，跨城市、跨省份、跨国家，被问到“你是哪里人？”的时候，背后选项越多，选择某一答案的考量就颇有意思了。
选择祖籍地的，或许是对宗亲祖辈怀有深情，也可能此地人文荟萃，名噪天下；选择出生、成长的城市，或许是对那里记忆深刻；选择成家立业的地方，或许因为那里有主要人际关系的网络，在那里才感觉到拥有和归属。
不管是基于什么原因、又作出怎样的选择，我们不难发现其中必然有着对所选地的感情和认同。这种认同既不是民族认同，也有别于国家认同，我将它称之为一种“归属认同”。
这种归属认同，看来有以下几个特点。第一，认同的主体要具备流动性。或是在一国的不同城市，或是行走于不同国家。人们在流动之间，对所处的城市和环境产生不同程度的认知情感，形成归属认同的基础。
第二，归属认同与国家认同有交叉，但不隶属同一范畴。归属认同可以建立在国家认同的基础上，在一个国家的不同城市间作出符合情感的选择。也可以跨越国度，一个在外国生活的移民，在情感和法律上分别认同不同的国家和城市并非不可能。
去年笔者到澳洲公干，负责接待的一位公关顾问是纽西兰人，已经在澳洲工作了不少年。她对我说，“我很喜欢澳洲，虽然在这里我是外国人。不过，接待你这个外国人的时候，我又成了澳洲人。我很喜欢这种感觉。”
台湾的萧美琴持美国护照，又担任总统顾问一职，也可说是归属认同与国家认同不并轨的一个例证。
第三，这种归属认同赋予主体充分的自主性和可选择性。籍贯、出生地无从选择，但这种“后天”的归属认同则让主体根据自己的生活经历和体验，选择最愿归属的一个所在。
一个能够让人成功地建立“归属认同”的地方，一定有着特别的魅力和吸引点。优美的环境、热情的市民、优雅的社会、方便的起居出行、更多成功的机会等等，不一而足。
激烈的全球竞争已经使不少国家和城市开始用“归属认同”来凝聚外来人才的精神世界。活力四射的上海就是例证。曾几何时，上海被称为“最排外”的城市，在上海人的眼里，所有外地人都是“乡下人”。
而如今，上海以宽阔的胸怀迎接人才，崇尚“新上海人”的概念，不管你从哪里来，只要是在上海工作、创业，就是“新上海人”。上海吸引到了全球资本和人才，现在的上海，不会讲上海话的“上海人”比比皆是。
“归属认同”对于新加坡这样的移民社会似乎也有着特别的意义。一个社会如果能让过客、外来人才都认同、都乐意“归属”，一定会有充足的发展活力。
